Sacrilegious Sunday Again, but...

I know I said that today I would talk about God, religion, Marx, and the social contract between them all, but I just couldn’t sit down and write that essay tonight. So instead, I thought I would write only what came to mind today and yesterday. Tonight I will write about several undeniable truths, perhaps some will be blasphemous for our purposes of Sacrilegious Sunday. If you can deny them, then there is a place strictly for you fools to rebuttal. But as it is not until the end of this post, you’ll have to kindly wait until then. And without much further ado, here are those undeniable truths. They are as followed:

1. Everything always looks better when others are in the process of doing those things
2. Swings are fun. If you love the swing, it will love you back.
3. One can always avoid an argument by not speaking.
4. If one is sitting alone drinking, then one is not an alcoholic if that one would rather be drinking along with others. That said person is just a loser.
5. No person really has direction in their lives. So, it is okay to feel lost sometimes. If it is only sometimes, then count yourself really lucky my friends.
6. Speed bumps were created by car mechanics so they can stick you with the awful charge of realignment.
7. People can’t walk through walls.
8. Listening to flowing water will make one have to pee.
9. Where ever one works, they will naturally feel like their workplace is a piece of shit.
10. I can’t and ever will be able to spell properly.
11. Life is quite organized till you show up.
12. Everyone and everything will all die eventually.
13. Jesus smells like pie.
14. (And sticking to a sacrilegious ending…) God is as believable as we want him to be.